Monday, February 14, 2011

Headaches & Migraines

I don't have one today. If I did, this would be a much less pleasant post.

Before we go further, dearest invisibility, please allow me to differentiate between the two experiences. Please? Pleeeeeeease? Don't make me beg. Thank you.

1) Headaches

A headache marked by [wait for it...] pain in your head. No, really. Sometimes it's really awful pain. Some people feel sick when they have a headache. Or sleepy. Or both.

2) Migraines

A migraine is when the idea of taking a power drill and boring holes into your skull to relieve pressure starts to seem like a reasonable idea.

See the difference?

According to my mother, who was there, I started getting migraines when I was about two. Yes. Two. Evidently, I would try to eat everything that wasn't nailed down or moving, then I'd throw up, then I'd fall asleep for 2-15 hours. Doesn't that sound like every mother's dream? Not only to have a two-year-old [gah!] but to have one who behaved like this?

I think this may explain some of the conflict between my mother and me. Not that Mom holds grudges. [nodding] She would never do that. [nodding] She would never use this against me as an adult. [nodding]

Anyway. If you ever swing by my work and the overhead lights are off and only task lighting is being used, just back out of the room. Come back tomorrow. Really. It's best that way.

Years ago, I worked a weekend shift at my hospital in Boise. One Saturday night, I had a BITCH of a migraine. It involved covering my eyes/head while seated at the desk, in between draws. It included projectile vomiting. It included hanging on by a thread until the night techs came in and I could desert my coworker like a rat leaving a sinking ship. The lead tech that night came to me and apologized, saying I could go home and that she hadn't realized this was such a dire situation. I left. I went home. I got unconscious. The following day, I felt so much better. And people in the lab kept sidling up to me, asking how I was. Speaking softly. Tiptoeing away, just in case. I turned to my fellow phlebotomist Sheila and asked, "Was I that bad yesterday?"

She stared at me in disbelief and replied, "You were possessed yesterday."

Yeah. Just back out of the room. Come back tomorrow. Really. It's best that way.


  1. Oh, sh!t. See what you stuck in my head?

    Yes, headaches and migraines from hell.


    Just a drill? You're a much stronger person than I.

    May the nasty Migraine not find you.

  2. thanks for the tip ;) hmmmm...